i’ve been thinking a lot this month about outlining, and how i outline. it’s a question authors get asked a lot — how do you plan, do you even plan, are you a plotter or a pantser, etc. i feel like my answer changes every time i’m asked. part of the reason for that is just because i haven’t written very many books. i was lucky in that the first book i properly outlined, wrote, and completed was the first book of mine to be published. before the daughters of izdihar, i’d only ever written bits and pieces of unfinished works. i have a terrible, terrible habit of starting books, making it about a quarter of the way through, and abandoning them for a shiny new idea.
this month, i fell victim once more to that habit, and abandoned a work-in-progress for a shiny new idea i’ll call knight & wreckage. in theory, i’d plotted it all out completely, in a feverish state spurred by a lot of anime watching. as i started writing, i realized, of course, that such a state generated only vague vibes and an overall arc rather than an actual tightly plotted story (as in, i had a big picture, but i was missing all the details, all the logistics, all the subplots). i started to see the plot holes, the lack of proper character arcs, the superficial worldbuilding.
i also saw choices. this is often the crux of my writing problems. there are so many choices, so many possible directions to take a story. how do i choose the right one? the best one? for knight & wreckage, i wrote down a specific plotline, complete with ending, but now i’m second guessing myself. is this the plot i want to write? is it creative enough? is it fun enough? is it right for this story? unfortunately, i’m the only one who can answer those questions.
i have worldbuilding 101 guide that i definitely don’t use as often as i should — or rather, sometimes i’m afraid to use it, because if i use it, that makes the story real, and i’m afraid i’ll lose that feverish creativity that comes with a brand new idea that isn’t limited by any logistical constraints. i also find worldbuilding very fun for the sake of it, and so sometimes i’ll spend so much time worldbuilding (and thus, researching) that i’ll forget to write. but then i end up in decision paralysis, and i neither worldbuild nor write.
i am trying to defeat that by actively thinking about my outlining process, and whether it differs from project to project, or if my process itself is consistent across projects, just inconsistent within a single project (i.e. some parts are outlined, some parts are pantsed, depending on Vibes). all that to say, i hope to write a post this month about my outlining process as i outline (or not?) knight & wreckage.
also! i am currently on submission with the project i finished revising last month, which is very exciting!
anime;
the anime train continues…
horimiya (season 1);
this is a popular slice of life romance anime that at first i thought would be an all time favorite. i was obsessed in the first few episodes. i still like it a lot, but there are a few things that made me pause (there’s an entire episode dedicated to the female MC’s public humiliation/abuse kink that i’m still not sure was even real because what).
it also starts to feel a bit disjointed after a while, and oddly paced, which made a lot more sense once i realized that season 2 adapts the parts of the manga that season 1 did not get to adapt — so, basically, lots of buildup and character development. it’s an absolutely bonkers choice, especially considering season 1 ends on a pretty final note. it feels like a complete story, so to have season 2 go back in time and jump around feels like shooting yourself in the foot.
watching season 2 feels almost like reading fanfic of a show you like, now that it’s over, so it’s fun, but there’s no urgency, so i’ll probably watch it pretty slowly. that said, i’d still recommend season 1, despite some of the weirder elements. it’s just generally a very wholesome show with a super sweet friend group. it’s also really, really funny.
demon slayer;
the big thing for me this month was finally watching all four seasons of demon slayer, one of the three (imo) modern day classics (the others being attack on titan and jujutsu kaisen). this is a solid, super fun, classic shonen anime with amazing fight scenes and the best main character. i love tanjiro kamado (pictured above on the far left). he’s such a good-hearted sweet boy and he is my role model.
to be honest i don’t have very much else to say about demon slayer. it’s a good time. it’s not super deep, it’s problematic in a very ordinary way (that is, the female characters are not many and not great and there is unnecessary fanservice), and the plot is fairly straightforward (well done, but not super unique). it knows what it is, and it does that very well.
i suppose its one distinguishing feature is its animation. it’s got a super unique style with very boldly drawn lines and very strange, even creepy, eyes. also, all of the characters looks super duper young, even the adults. it’s not my favorite style at all, but it definitely stands out in a crowd. i can always recognize a demon slayer scene when i see it.
i don’t want to undersell this, though, or underestimate my enthusiasm for it! i was literally shouting at my screen with excitement as i watched, because i became that invested in the story. this is a fantastic watch.
naruto (episodes 1-82);
i of course have a very long history with naruto; it is the anime that marks the heights of my teenage anime obsession. however, i never actually finished the series! my best friend, who just got into anime last year, also wanted to watch it, and so we decided to embark on this journey together. we’re watching an abridged version (called the kai version) that cuts out all filler and streamlines the viewing experience, which is why we were able to watch 82 episodes in a week.
and, well, we loved it. it’s a classic for a reason. of course it has its issues and has aged pretty poorly (the gender dynamics, the fat shaming, sakura’s relentless crush on sasuke, naruto’s sexy jutsu, jiraiya’s entire character), but there are also banger fights (rock lee vs gaara will forever be a true cinematic experience), great characters (kakashi, rock lee), well-developed friendships (ino and sakura, naruto and sakura, naruto and sasuke), interesting worldbuilding and abilities, and occasional chaos. it’s so much fun.
thus far, we are still watching the OG naruto, and we are so excited to advance to shippuden. i’ve only seen a few episodes of shippuden, and i remember basically nothing at all, so i’m super excited to finally finish the series!
windbreaker (season 2);
still adore this show, though season 2 definitely felt a lot more disjointed than season 1, which had a longer and more complete arc throughout the season. i didn’t mind, though, because we get to see the characters grow and develop on their own and also in their relationships with each other. i do think that the show introduces a lot of new characters when it should spend more time developing the characters it has already introduced, but it’s not a huge deal.
what i will say is i was pleasantly astounded by one new character, tsubakino (pictured above on the right), who appears to be trans. i say “appears” because apparently the mangaka did not intend to write them as transgender, but rather as gender non-conforming but still using he/him pronouns. it seems, though, that many fans see tsubakino as a trans woman, and the ensuing clashes between fans arguing about the character’s gender identity reminds me a lot of the arguments over whether willow from buffy the vampire slayer is gay or bi.
it brings us back to the idea of watsonian vs doylist exegesis: that is, if we are using an in-universe pov (watsonian), then willow, as a real person claiming a gay identity despite having dated and loved a man, would be gay because that’s how she is identifying, but given that willow is written by a man with…questionable understandings of queerness (joss whedon), it is very fair for the fandom to question if this is in fact bisexual erasure (an out-of-universe, or doylist, exegesis acknowledging the authorial perspective and intentions).
regardless of how the mangaka intended to portray tsubakino, though, the fact remains that they are well-written. i don’t think i’ve ever seen a character like this in anime, especially not one depicted so respectfully. tsubakino gets a whole backstory that delves into their gender dysphoria in a way that manages not to feel like a Message Episode, but rather just a very natural part of their character building. everything about their introduction is just sweet and wholesome and effortless, and they’re a wonderful addition to the second season.
love of kill;
i absolutely did not mean to watch love of kill at all, but i tried an episode and couldn’t stop watching. it’s not even particularly good; it feels like a collection of tropes masquerading as a show with proper plot and narrative. but the problem is the tropes are fun and the character dynamics are interesting and so i was sucked in. in particular the main male MC, who is very unhinged, is fun to watch. i think there was a lot of squandered potential here for a very interesting story, but i binged this in like two sittings (and it’s only 12 episodes with a lot of recap, so the runtime is quite short) and had a very good time, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
film;
in an attempt to not rot my brain solely with anime, i watched (1) film this month, called rafiki. it’s about two gay women in kenya and the trouble their relationship faces because of homophobia and because their dads are running against each other in the local election. unfortunately i wanted way more from this film than i got; it felt half-baked and underdeveloped. it had a lot of pretty shots and an explosion of color, which was lovely, but the characters and plot felt very rote and unoriginal.
i’ve also re-watched a few older black mirror episodes (white christmas, shut up and dance, hated in the nation) that reminded me of just how good black mirror used to be. the new seasons are always fun and fairly enjoyable, but the quality is markedly subpar in contrast to the older episodes, which were much more hard-hitting.
books;
the ministry of time by kaliane bradley
margo’s got money troubles by rufi thorpe
fable for the end of the world by ava reid
slammerkin by emma donoghue
the second death of locke by vl bovalino
i read way more than i thought this month, especially considering how busy i was. slammerkin was a holdover from last month; i’d put it on an unofficial pause for a while not because i wasn’t enjoying it, but because other things took over. i loved it; donoghue does historical fiction so well, and manages to capture a heroine who is prickly, contrary, and unlikable, and so very compelling. i’ll be thinking about that ending for a long time.
i thought the ministry of time was fascinating; such a quirky idea! i was in love with bradley’s quippy, sharp, clever writing. i’m really excited to see what she puts out next!
i was sent an arc of the second death of locke, one of my most anticipated releases of the year, by the publisher to blurb, and i loved it! it has one of my favorite fantasy romances and i was so delighted to provide a blurb. it comes out this september!
other bits and bobs;
the mozart of the attention economy is a fascinating profile of youtube’s mr beast, who i’ve always known about via cultural osmosis (and my brother), but whose videos i’ve never actually watched. the profile delves into mr beast’s history and antics, and how he became the most successful youtuber of all time, but has incisive commentary on what his videos indicate about our declining attention spans and descent into cutthroat capitalism.
when convenience kills talks about trader joe’s, tv dinners, and the problem of american convenience
cool things i learned about this month:
the bouba-kiki effect (linguistics is so cool)
apple dolls (very creepy)
obsessed with this amv of bts’s mic drop (i never got into bts but i love this song)
the most terrifying character ever written, about fictional characters who are genuinely scary, makes me really want to watch the anime monster
so i stumbled across this short anime episode called chronoir episode 0 and i was like, oh cool, what is this. and i learned that it was made by a vocal duo, so i was like, okay, let me see who these guys are. turns out that they are both fictitious digital creations by a company called nijisanji which is a “virtual youtuber agency” that creates animations who i guess…stream and pretend to be real people? i am too old for this.
dpr ian’s song don’t go insane is incredible and so is the music video
also megan thee stallion’s neva play is incredible and the animated music video is so good
cheers,
hadeer